Love the story posted down there. My mum forwarded that email to me..haha. Super touching =)
Teacher's day celebration today. Kinda unfortunate that it rained, so the event couldnt be held at pasir ris park. Oh well..it was rather boring i guess. Seems like every occassion has the same things happening. National day and teacher's day. Like same kinda performances. Went back to PL, met a few old friends but went off even before meeting any of my teachers! DAng..Was super tired lah..was like stoning home with ele. Didnt even have the energy to talk. Dunno what was wrong with me also lah.
Slept for nearly 5 hrs. Whole afternoon gone. I'm gonna study tonight! i must and i will. Whee~ cant think of anything much to post. Whole week of school life has been quite stale. Quite disappointed with some pple whose level of maturity seems to be way lower than my 10 yr old brother.
hmm do we really look that alike?? Leon, my twin bro
Best friendss! look at how mad we can get
Racial harmony forever! i love you two!!
06S415 without cedric-my favourite classmate. one day one dayy..
lizzy's memories at 10:22 PM
On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and shy.. I was a strong and happy bridegroom.
This was the scene ten years ago.
The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid; I went into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were steadily increasing, the affection between us seemed to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school.
Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.
Dew came into my life.
It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was the apartment I bought for her.
Dew said, you are the kind of man who best draws girls' eyeballs. Herwords suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we were just married, my wife said, Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls.
Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed mywife.. But I couldn't help doing so.
I moved Dew's hands aside and said you go to select some furniture, O.K.? I've got something to do in the company. Obviously she was unhappy, because I had promised to do it together with her. At the moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something impossible to me.
However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt.
Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon. Then we watched TV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew's body. This was the means of my entertainment.
One day I said to her in a slightly joking way, suppose we divorce, what will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I couldn't imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious.
When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide something while talking to her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.
Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more.
When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I've got something to tell you, I said. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the serious topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I'm serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer made her angry.. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!
That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew.
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But I could not take back what I had said.
Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer.
Late that night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her writing something at the table. I fall asleep fast. When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.
She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but I was supposed to give her one month s time before divorce, and in the month's time we must live as normal a life as possible. Her reason was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she didn't want him to see our marriage was broken.
She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day? This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me.
I nodded and said, I remember. You carried me in your arms, she continued, so, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning.I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage romantically.
I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me feel uncomfortable.
My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, Let us start from today, don't tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for a bus, I drove to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this intimate woman carefully for a long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face.
On the third day, she whispered to me, the outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Dew became vague.
On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc. I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger. I didn't tell Dew about this.
I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now. She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a sense of pain.. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head.
Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it's time to carry mum out. He said. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.
On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. She said, actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old.
I held her tightly and said, both you and I didn't notice that our life lacked intimacy.
I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won't divorce. I'm serious.
She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no fever.. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I can only say sorry to you, I won't divorce.
My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of life, not becausewe didn't love each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you.
Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove to the office.
When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until we are old.
lizzy's memories at 10:05 PM
Sunday, August 27, 2006
No one ever saw me like you do
All the things that I could add up too
I never knew just what a smile was worth
But your eyes see everything without a single word
CHORUS'
Cause there's somethin' in the way you look at me
It's as if my heart knows you're the missing piece
You make me believe that there's nothing in this world I can't be
I never know what you see
But there's somethin' in the way you look at me
If I could freeze a moment in my mind
It'll be the second that you touch your lips to mine
I'd like to stop the clock, make time stands still
'Cause, baby, this is just the way I always wanna feel
[BRIDGE]
I don't know how or why I feel different in your eyes
All I know is it happens every time
Updating now! Beautiful song up there. It really is. If i knew how to upload a song onto blogger, i would put it here alr but unfortunately i dont. So anyway the song is really nice and the lyrics are so sweettt!
It's been a week since i went to the national library and i'm alr missing the place. Ahh! I wanna go back soon. But they're really strict bout what we bring in and all so yea, gotta be extra discreet. Lit project is over! we managed to pass =) 15/25 for a half done project. Hehehe well done gals, love you two loads.
School has been both hectic and great at the same time. Big apology to the house comm first. Haha i haven been doing much for IHG i know..the two times i stayed back i didnt even do anything! First time was with gordon so we still walked around occasionally to see things but when i stayed back the second time, i did my work instead..so like not staying back at all. Haha but i'm so glad everyone did welll and triton are the champs once again! yayness =)
I love pe lessons now cos we're learning the dance for aces day. one hip hop and the other kick-boxing. kick boxing rocks with jacelyn. So enthu! was really damn fun.
It's mad rush now. Promos are coming but they're still teaching syllabus. That is totally a turn off i tell you and this is what my math tutor told us "this tutorial ah..we will be going thru next yr". And we were all like ??!!! and the best part is that topic is included in our exams. Like so cartoon lah!! Oh wells, other than tt. I'm glad I FINALLY gotten started on revision. I think i'm like quite late alr. argh!
Oh oh! i shall post this: MR FONG IS TAKING PL FOR SYF NEXT YEAR!! i feel like kissing that madman pls. Last year told us that he's migrating to macau??!! and now he's back to take the gals for syf!! I was so elated when wanyi told me the news. Seriously..even though both of us won't be under him (sadddd!!) but we're super super happy that he's taking PL HANDBELL CHOIR for syf and not some other pple. I feel like jumping ard even as i post this. Hehehe
And to my bestest friend. KEE WEN MINN! Congrats once again!!! I'm so proud of you gal. Be more confident okay! And when are u gonna treat me with ur monetary award?! 500 bucks must share ahh =p
*My life has been turned ard because i found someone special.
lizzy's memories at 5:59 PM
Saturday, August 19, 2006
Was here ytd as well..reading up on austen's books. Gosh, read until got headache sia. So many things to read about!!!! So anyway, we gotta do up the ppt and stuff later on. Sheesh, hopefully we finish it. GOtta present on monday alr! Dang. Oh and this is only my second time to the national library since it renovated. Lol ytd was my first time here. So suaku. It's really quiet but the only turn off part is that we cant bring in our bags into reference levels. So its like, i have to take out nearly everything from my bag, carry them in my arms, throw my nearly empty bag into a locker, and go into the library. Quite retarded but oh well, its the national library.
There's the gal/lady sitting opposite me now. Same person i was sitting opposite to when i was here in the library ytd. How coincidental. Hmm..WHERE THE HELL IS SHIKIN AND NIKSTERRR!!!
Supposed to meet at 11am, and now it's alr 15 mins to 12pm. They're the best lah..oh wells, still love them. hahaha kk, i better go get started on the ppt first. Yuck yuck powerpoint sucks!
lizzy's memories at 11:41 AM
Thursday, August 17, 2006
Missed the last 2 lessons on wednesday. Forced by aaron tan to go home cos he didnt want me to infect the rest of my classmates. made me feel so inconsiderate =( Oh well, he's nice lah. Went to see the doc but it was closed! So instead of going home, i waited for about 45 mins before they opened. Sat in the clinic, was freezing cold.
So anyway, didnt go back to school today. Wasn't feeling too well still, so just slept a little more. had to go down to TB control unit again (and thank God it's the last time! i'm finally discharged) to check the results. had to take xray and all..the doctor doing the xray looks like some old man who lived past worldwarII and still surviving. Lol he's old and cute lah.
Rushing out my WR now. Yea, how ironic. Rushing it but still got time to blog. Haha actually what made me blog was because i've got something to announce. Lol! I saw this old old woman in a freaking bikini at the pool!!! Ultimate gross pls. I shall not comment further but you shd know how i feel. I was about to relax my eyes by looking out to the pool but viola, i see the old bikini woman. SORE EYES AH! okay enough.
Oh did i mention, fireworks on saturday was incredible.
lizzy's memories at 4:35 PM
Friday, August 11, 2006
S.O.P at SCH..my 2 fantastic juniors =) look at how fat i've become after coming into JC. GROSS
There you go, that's err nearly the class. A few missing but yea they still rock =) i still look like a guy here..dang.
Stephen and jaron back from the states. Lol fyi, pris is actually quite tall okay. so yea, stephen is..TALLER. reminiscing our younger days =)
See what happens when we stay together for so long, we start to look alike. SCARY
lizzy's memories at 12:27 PM
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
Handbells was fantasticcc! I think they were really good. Minor minor mistakes here and there, probably wont be picked up by normal players, but hello...i'm a handbell ringer, obviously i can spot the mistakes. Lol! Okay enough, overall was nice =) Noella yan's performance, handbells and guzheng were the best performances lah! Hahaha i'm not being biased alrights but its based on facts. Haha!
so anyway, evening was spent with wm, fel and elvia. Interesting company. Haha! trained home with wanyi, mel png and frens. I felt old. lol! So anyway, the $25 did justice.
*
Patterson's were back on sunday. So good to see them again. Lunched with them for a while then had to go home to do up lit essay and study for chem test. sianess. Down to the airport later to send sophia and family off to the US. nearly teared when i gave her a hug before i left for another gathering. 2 whole yearS!! mannn...........
Gathering at cheng wah's place for the patterson family. back to the old days. Pris, rach, ele and me..bliss. trying to harmonise songs for fun..so cartoons. choir choir all the way sia. Lol! when we reached 9.30pm, i was getting kan choing to go home cos i hadn't finished studying chem. Oh wellss. so that was my very jam-packed sunday.
*
National Celebrations today. performance was rather screwed in the LT where the j2s were but i guess it was RATHER fine. Hall was much better even though i kept laughing at who-knows-what. was quite cartoon and i kept laughing at zhu-en when we were standing together cos he cldnt get his timing right. it was hilarious.
went to town with the class. lunched at swensens! was a lazy tuesday afternoon man. Shikin and i felt like sleeping and just lazing there the whole afternoon. was like damn fun. kept laughing at bryan's inflating stomach, was so retarded. his whole stomach was like bloated up when he sucked in air. it was hilarious..sat there for some time. Took photos here and there, went over to coffeebean, celebrated leon's birthday! my dahling twin brother =)
Went home after that with yi cheng. Both of us were pretty stoned on the train. REnted "Rumour has it" from the dvd machine when i got home. Fell aslp on my bed the moment i reached home, slept for about 2 hrs then woke up to watch the show. so here i am now. Lols. enough of this. going back to slp again. Haha
some evaluation needs to be done. an analysis of what is becoming of this.
lizzy's memories at 8:33 PM